The Timeskip Episode: 2021 recap
Hmm.... definitely didn't intend for there to be a literal year gap in between this and my last post, yet here we are!
Honestly, so much has happened... where do I even begin. How do I even organize this. By month? By topic?
I'll just write and see how we do.
So, basically, I'll start with the big news: I'm moving back to California. While I did manage to move out of Long Island and into NYC (or rather, Astoria, Queens) which was a relief, I ended up... really missing LA. I would blame Nomadland, since watching that film brought on a wave of nostalgia for the West Coast like no other, but if I'm being honest, I found myself looking back at Los Angeles ever since I made the decision to move to New York in the first place. It was weird, once I recognized that I was homesick. It wasn't a feeling I was familiar with, since I was so accustomed to moving. But there were many times I had to wrench myself back and focus on NYC, which was something I didn't have to do with LA. I can say that I really did try with New York. My mindset was 100% in on the city. I painted the walls in my room and crammed as much as I could into that little 10x10 space and made plans for space-saving options... I tried going out and meeting new people. But in the end, I realized that I really did miss LA. Which left me in a conundrum: do I stay and try to make it work in NYC? Stick to the plan and do grad school here? Or go back to Cali and try grad school there?
In the end, it came down to the fact that most of my closest friends live in California. While I'm sure I could have built up a new support group in New York... I realized that I just... didn't want to. Why, when I already had such a good crew? I was finding myself preferring to stay in to hang out virtually with friends, rather than go out and risk an awkward hang on the off-chance that someone I met might want to invest in a friendship with me that I may or may not reciprocate. Good friends are hard to come by, and at 28, I was realizing the virtues of growing and nurturing what you already have, instead of seeking out something new all the time.
Or, I guess, you could say I was just socially lazy.
Regardless, after a visit to the West Coast in August, I had made up my mind: I'd be returning. And thus began my moving timeline, which I am currently in the thickest part of the weeds. Due to finances (aka tattoos), I won't be able to immediately return to LA, which is a bit of a bummer. I'll be staying in North Carolina for a few months to save money, decompress, and collect myself, and I'm looking forward to spending more time with family, since I haven't really lived with them for an extended amount of time since I graduated high school. Should be interesting at the very least!
The dream of grad school hasn't died though! In fact, I'm currently applying to a Comics MFA program at CCA. My application is about halfway done; everything has been started, but still needs refinement. But I'm very excited about the curriculum, faculty, and low-residency option. I'm trying to submit everything by the end of the year, so fingers crossed!
I've also done a BUNCH of traveling. The entire second half of 2021 I was visiting a new place almost every month. Acadia in July, California in August, Utah in September, Philly in October, California again in November, and next month I will be visiting family in Korea! So yes, very VERY busy, as you can imagine! But also very fun and exciting. It's been a blast being able to hang out with my friends and family again, and very fulfilling. It led me to realize that I really only want three things in life: to travel, do art, and hang out with people I care about. And all three at the same time leaves me a very happy person.
Suffice to say it shouldn't be surprising to hear that I've been doing a lot of reflecting this past year. I feel 2021 was similar to 2019 in that I hit a point where I was very uncertain and unsure of what I wanted in my future. Or, I suppose more accurately, where I wanted my future. But I've finally reached a point where I have my goal in sight, and the path is clear, which relieves a lot of stress. Related, because of the previously mentioned revelation (combined with more than one bystander asking if I was selling my art anywhere) I've been looking again at my 2018 ambitions of being an independent artist. I'm hoping without the added pressure of unemployment (I've no plans to quit my day job anytime soon) that things will be a little more successful this time around. Mainly because I will have more plan to feel things out and won't feel rushed. Plus, in general, I feel I have a better grasp on how I work and what works for me, which should also help.
Most recently, I just ran a marathon which I am super proud of, especially since I wasn't sure if I'd even be able to. I'll be writing a separate post about that journey, but it happened! And I did it in under 7 hours! Yeah!!
Those are the biggest updates. There's plenty of smaller things, like that I dyed my hair multiple times and am currently growing out a mullet. I've gotten several new tattoos. I've tried medication for mental health. I've gained a bit of muscle. I've updated my wardrobe. I've drawn several comics I'm very proud of, specifically one about my gender journey. I've managed to do some animation freelance work. I'm currently developing an independent animated short with some friends. I've been continuing to record the podcast I cohost with another one of my good friends ("We Don't Watch Movies" if you wanna check it out :3) I started playing FFXIV. I've met up with a few old friends I hadn't seen in a while, but also had a couple friendships end. I've been driving up and down the east coast a LOT. I've been taking private lessons for Korean and seeing a marked improvement. I've been reading and watching movies and listening to albums. I've been at my most stressed, but also my most happy.
Overall, from my perspective right now, I've been... good.